So you've been using those wimpy safety razors, eh?! Back in your grandfather's day, not only did he travel to school uphill, both ways, in a freezing blizzard with no shoes - nope, He also had to use the sharpest tool known to man to shave three times a day at 9 years old. Ya know what 'ol grand pappy used? The good 'ol straight razor. Let's be a man and throw safety out the window. Get the best shave in the world while risking your life every morning. Shave like grandpa did when he was 9 years old. Shave like a pro.
*The writer of this piece may have had a scotch or three. We do not condone unsafe shaving practices, but we do have a great sense of humour. Shave safely.